Yari & Rob
Hi! We are Yari and Rob, and we are so grateful that you are reading our book and taking the time to get to know us. We will do our best through these pages to share our lives with you and also what is in our hearts.
The first thing we want to say is that though we are not in your shoes, we imagine that the decision you are faced with has not been an easy one. We think you are incredibly brave and selfless and no matter what you decide, you have our support. Whether or not you choose us, we will keep you and your baby in our prayers, today and always.
With much love and gratitude,
Yari & Rob
Our Adoption Story
From early on in our relationship, we had many conversations that revolved around our future together. We were always on the same page about wanting to be parents, and we had discussed our shared dream to have children together and we were open to the different ways that could happen. In all honesty, we pretty much assumed, as often people do in their younger years, that everything would just go smoothly and be so easy, and our big family would pop up before our eyes. We both have so much love to give, and are always joking around that in our friendships, we would rather be around our friends’ and family’s children than the adults! There was no doubt that having children, including through adoption, was something we wanted with all of our hearts, and believed it would happen quickly. Unfortunately, that was not the case for us.
Once we got married, we tried to start our family naturally, with no success. We went ahead with some fertility treatments but each time we were met with failure. Even though we were heartbroken (and exhausted) from that experience, we remained confident that God still did (and does!) have a plan for us to become parents. We soon started to really talk and learn more about adoption. The more we talked and the more we learned, we realize that our dream of becoming parents through adoption could actually be a deeply meaningful experience that could be filled with so much love. And so began our adoption journey which has now led us to you. And here we are today, at this moment together. We are proud to have taken the time we needed to get here, and we are ready to go down this path with you.
Our Promise to You
We want you to know that your baby will be loved with all of our hearts. We promise to nurture and raise your child with unconditional love and will support them in their life, every step of the way. We will teach them the importance of respect and hard work and will support them as they explore what makes them happy in life. We will be hands-on parents and will make sure your child knows they can always come to us, no matter what.
We would be honored to have a relationship with you, if you are open to that. We will be open from the start about how we became a family and will do everything in our power to make sure they grow up feeling secure. We would love to learn more about what you have in mind when it comes to an open adoption and ongoing communication – since we could be going on this journey together, we want to make sure our lines of communication are open and that you feel comfortable to ask us any questions you may have for us.
Finally, but definitely not least of all, we value our faith in Christ, and we will share this with your child. Our faith and our community are inseparable from our sense of parenthood, and it warms our hearts to think of a future with your child in our lives.
About Us
We met through an incredible and exciting journey called online dating! Specifically, OKCupid! Truth be told, I (Rob) absolutely could not stand online dating and never thought I would meet my wife on an app. Yari also was not a fan and said that she never would have created a profile on her own. After attending a singles conference where one of the married couples mentioned meeting on OkCupid, I figured, why not give it a try? Yari, at the time, had a roommate who had created a profile for her to help her meet someone, as the cycle of work, home, repeat was not yielding any results for her either. Yari doesn’t believe me, but I always tell her she was the very first profile I saw! I love what she wrote about the most important things to her being her faith, her family, and working hard on her doctoral degree in psychology. Her profile spoke to me, and I made sure I wrote her a whole essay, so she knew I didn’t just look at her pictures 🙂
We messaged back and forth, spoke on the phone for several hours a night (a little old school, we know), and finally met when she flew back from visiting her family in Puerto Rico. I picked her and Ascher, (an adorable and very emotionally needy Shiba Inu pup) up from the airport. I brought some snacks and water for them (Ascher did not eat any of my snacks – he was testing me, for sure), and we agreed that our first official date would be the next night on July 4th, 2015. It was a smooth but not boring journey to marriage.
Through hills and valleys, we grew in our friendship, admiration for one another, and ultimately in our love. We definitely have a lot in common, including the fact that we like relaxing at home with a good movie, and indulging in eating out some evenings. We enjoy the company of good friends and family, understanding that life is made up of the garden of relationships you nurture. Our weekends are generally spent having breakfast together, with Rob usually making pancakes or French toast, or Yari making waffles. After we’ve done any errands or chores around the house, we may go for a walk, watch a movie or grab a meal together with friends in the city. You will probably also find us doing some cooking and meal prep – our favorite homemade meals are lasagna, turkey chili, and rice and chicken. Then on Sundays, we attend church together, where we serve as Care Pastors. We have an incredibly loving and supportive community, and we feel very blessed to be surrounded by so much love.
About Yari
Through Rob’s Eyes
Describing Yari would take pages and pages (when she reads this part, it’ll hopefully earn me some cool points), but I will try to keep it brief. She is incredibly patient, affectionate, and sweet. There is a unique ability she has where she can display composure and compassion in the midst of real difficulties. She approaches confrontation with affirming words and is so good at making people feel seen and heard.
A little more about Yari… She was born and raised in San Juan, Puerto Rico, and came to New York City to finish her doctoral degree in Clinical Psychology. And although she planned to return home following her studies, she just so happened to meet someone special and decided to stay here in NYC 😉
She doesn’t enjoy waking up too early but makes a quick recovery after a nice cup of coffee and a good breakfast. Yari loves competition shows on TV (think cooking, talent, physical challenges – you name it, she loves them all!). She is a big fan of beaches (but not so much the ones here in NYC), and when we visit her family in PR, we spend a lot of time checking out the sand and the ocean. Have I mentioned she is also a chocoholic?!
Yari currently works for our church as a coordinator for the kids programming – a job she loves and is so good at. She is also involved with a women’s support group for a non-profit organization in NYC. And last but not least, she provides child care for a few families who are close to us. She does all this while preparing to take her licensing exam so she can practice psychology here in New York. It isn’t an easy test to prepare for, but I am so confident that she will accomplish her goal.
Yari will be an incredible mother. There is no question in my mind that your child will be so blessed to learn from and be loved by her. She will teach them thoughtfully and will create a home where they feel safe and sound simply because she is there. She has been preparing to be a mother for so many years, and although it has been a rocky road to getting there, I know it has not diminished her dream to love your child. She is someone who will show her love in action, and by raising them with compassion, good values, and with her as an example, they will thrive. I know that no one is perfect, and I’m sure she would say there are so many things she would like to change or improve upon, but I can say wholeheartedly that Yari is such a good person – she is my wife and my best friend and I am excited to see her take on the role of mother.
About Rob
Through Yari’s Eyes
Rob stole my heart when we were dating for his thoughtfulness, his gentlemanliness, his faith, his love for Ascher (lol), his cooking, and how determined he was to marry me. I will never forget the first time I saw him in person – he picked me up at the airport as I was coming back from visiting my family (as you’ve already heard!). He arrived in his black Honda Civic, came out to help me with my bags, opened the door for me, took Ascher, and even had water and snacks not only for me but for Ascher too. That’s the kind of man he is – hard working, a good provider, and a person who cares that those around him are comfortable and happy.
He loves his coffee, and I really enjoy seeing him every morning having his cup and reading the Bible. He serves in our church as an Usher and two years ago, he was ordained as a Care Pastor and Elder of our church. He loves history and having routines, such as walking Ascher, fasting in the morning (but coffee is allowed!), then going to the gym, coming home to have breakfast, and getting ready to go to work. He is very disciplined, and he values his health and loves keeping himself active and strong. He does jujitsu and loves rewarding himself on weekends with a dessert or two, hehe. He also loves singing and making up his own songs. He loves reading and writing, and I can picture him reading to your baby every night.
Rob is currently in his 15th year serving in the NYPD. As a Sergeant, Rob works in a very unique unit that is tasked with mentoring at-risk youth. Over the years, he has gotten to work with children at every single stop of his career, and he sees that as his calling in life. He doesn’t believe it is a coincidence that he now helps run the operations and planning of a program that helps these kids get daily positive interaction with a police officer who truly cares for them. This program also partners with the New York Giants, which allows for some incredible moments and interactions with the players. It is really very special. Rob and his fellow officers work every day in hopes of playing a meaningful role in these boys’ lives.
Rob will be such a great father. I know he will take your baby for long walks to the park, playing for hours with them, being loving and nurturing, and being a silly dad. He will make it his priority to make sure your child has all they will ever need in life, and he will work hard to make that happen. He will teach your child values, how to be respectful and how to love others, how to be a person of integrity, and will teach them how to work hard for their dreams. I know that no matter what, he will put your child and our family before anything else.
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Ascher
Ascher is a very special (and funny!) member of our family. Ascher is an 11-year-old Shiba Inu, and he will be turning 12 on November 12th! He came into Yari’s life as a puppy when she first moved to NYC and definitely helped her to feel less lonely. He has always been a great companion! He is very independent and incredibly loyal, and sweet. He can also be a little stubborn with the funniest things. An example is every night towards the late evening, we give him a very short last walk to take care of business. In his mind, this is usually way past his bedtime, and he literally will refuse to get up! Any other time of day, he absolutely LOVES to be walked… but come night time, nope, he is good! Ascher is so very sweet and incredibly loving. He rests his head on your lap and looks at you with these longing eyes, like he knows all your worries. He loves to play fetch with the tennis balls and loves it when we kick the plush soccer ball around with him. Long walks in the park or sitting out front on the patio as Rob drinks coffee, watching people walk by, are some of Ascher’s favorite pastimes.
Our Home
We live in the diverse and vibrant neighborhood of Astoria, Queens. We have a beautiful backyard that allows us to go outside and get some sun and fresh air, and we think this will be the perfect spot for your child to have space to run and play! We have been calling the second bedroom “the baby’s room” since the moment we moved in, believing that one day it would be filled with a child’s laughter. Rob’s favorite space is the kitchen because that is where his espresso machine is, and for Yari, it’s the backyard because this is where you will find her kicking around a soccer ball for Ascher. We both love hanging out in the kitchen where we enjoy cooking and entertaining. Our living room is our cozy space filled with lots of plants and sunlight. It is where you will find us during our downtime, watching Yari’s favorite TV shows, and Rob on his PlayStation.
Our neighborhood is very walkable, and we love taking advantage of that. There are beautiful parks with lots of green space nearby. We enjoy hosting friends and family, especially for a BBQ or s’mores over the fire pit. There are loads of restaurants nearby (so much pizza!) and stores, and Rob’s gym is close by too. We live 5 blocks away from the train, so a trip to Manhattan is always really easy. Being in NYC, there is no shortage of things to do. From arts, music, an amazing food scene, to even the beaches (in the summer) – if you can think of it, it’s here! We love to escape from time to time to Orange County, NY, for some time in the country, as Rob has siblings who live there. Enjoying the mountains or a nice trail or travelling to the Bellevale Creamery for ice cream after a nice drive are some of our favorite getaways.
Sometimes we sit back and can’t believe how lucky we are to live in this area. We are really excited to raise a family here!
Our Loved Ones
We are both very lucky to have our parents in our lives – they are the warmest and most loving people who we can always count on to be there for us. Rob’s parents moved to Florida a few years ago (but we have a sneaking suspicion that they will move back to NY the moment they learn we will become a family of three). Yari has her wonderful parents in Puerto Rico, along with a brother and sister, and Rob is very close with both of his younger brothers. Our immediate family has been on this journey with us, and we have shared all the ups and downs of our fertility struggle and our decision to adopt. They have not only been incredibly supportive but are extremely excited!
Rob’s brothers will be amazing and fun uncles. They are both very smart and funny, and we are sure they will be the types of uncles who their nieces and nephews always want to spend time with. Rob’s parents are so loving and compassionate. They would give you the shirts off their backs if you needed it. Yari’s parents are steadfast, loving, and provide an incredible sense of stability and structure. Needless to say, both sets of grandparents will be strong support systems for your child.
Speaking of support systems, the incredible men and women of our church community are truly like a second family to us. These are people who we say we do life with together. Whether it be get-togethers at each other’s homes, having coffee or dessert to talk through life events, or big BBQs where we just get to enjoy the company and hang out, these are people that we wholeheartedly love and trust. They have also been with us through all of our trials and tribulations, victories and momentary setbacks, and have never wavered in making us feel like they have our backs.
When we say your child will truly have a village around them, we mean it quite literally. There are so many wonderful people in our lives who are loving and supporting us in our adoption journey and they cannot wait to love your child.
Holidays & Traditions
While we enjoy celebrating all the holidays, there are two that stand out for us. There is nothing like Christmas, as it is such a warm (despite the cold outside) and festive time of year. It is a time when Yari does an amazing job getting our home ready for the holidays. After we choose a tree that fits, we usually have family over, and we all decorate the tree together. Every year, we choose a different theme for the tree which makes each holiday season unique and really stand out for us. We love listening to traditional Puerto Rican music for la Navidad, which is called parranda, and drinking some coquito, a traditional drink from Puerto Rico. This, along with the closeness of family and friends throughout the season, creates a really special time that we are so excited to share with your child. Also, we celebrate Christmas as the day Jesus was born, and although we will absolutely keep alive the legend of Santa and his Reindeer in our home, we want our children to celebrate it as the birth of Christ as well.
Another holiday we look forward to every year is Thanksgiving. Any opportunity to get together with family and friends, and good food, is a reason to celebrate! We love visiting Yari’s family in Puerto Rico for this holiday or having Rob’s parents fly up from Florida. Rob’s brothers will often join us as well, so our home is usually full of conversation and laughter. Last year, for the first time ever, we were able to have both sets of parents together for Thanksgiving, and Rob’s mom had everyone doubled over with laughter. We also host a Friendsgiving event at our home every year with our friends and church community, where everyone brings a dish.
We are so excited to carry on these traditions and create new ones as a family of three!
We hope that as you have read our story, you were able to get a good picture of us and life together. Although we mentioned it earlier, we think it is worth saying again – we believe our purpose and joy in this world is to be parents. We hope that you can feel in your heart that if you choose us, you can trust that your baby will be raised in a home filled with unconditional love and respect, and will experience a life full of joy and promise. While we are not perfect and do not pretend to be, we believe that we can provide a consistent, positive, peace-filled, and warm home filled with unlimited unconditional love. A home and family where your child will grow into the amazing, strong, and loving person they are meant to be.
In making an adoption plan together with you, we will respect your wishes. We believe this is a road we would be honored to travel with you, and it is up to all of us to find a way to pave that road together. We understand the difficult decision you are faced with, and we do not take this lightly. For that, we will be forever grateful to you.
With much love and gratitude,
Yari & Rob
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